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    Write a Wedding Speech in Under Five Minutes

    Writing a Best Man or Maid of Honor Speech is tough, but you know what they say, “if you wait until the last minute, it only takes a minute.” If you’re reading this, you’re probably on your way to the reception and only have a napkin and a pin. Let’s get started!

    Since you don’t have time to memorize a speech, you have to rely on what you know. That’s the goal of the under 5 minute speech. Only put notes on the napkin you know inside and out. For example, if the speech is for your brother, describe your family a little bit. It will look something like:

    “For those of you who don’t know, my brother is the youngest of three. We each played football growing up and loved to fish. I always caught the most fish, but he caught _______(brides name) so I guess he won that battle”

    or for the Maid of Honor

    "My name is Katie and I'm the older sister of (Bride). When we were younger (Bride) and I use to spend hours dressing up barbie dolls, then as we got older we continue playing dress up, unfortnately the clothes became more expensive"

    These are easy fillers and you don’t have to think, so you won’t uhhh ummm uhh stutter when you speak.

    Do not write down the entire speech on a napkin. That means you don’t know what you’re speaking about. Just put reminders of stuff you already know. If you’re reading the speech to them, might as well just e-mail it everyone. Besides you don't have time for that.

    Again, only put down notes on your napkin that will help you remember a few stories. Not just any story, but a story you’ve told a thousand times. Whatever it is, find your best story and share it. If it’s not funny, who cares, it is too late at this point. Our goal is for you not to look like a fool. Every best man speech needs to have a flow. This is your flow.

    1. Start with a compliment and a thank you (example: let’s give a round of applause to the <Bride’s Name> because she looks beautiful tonight. Let’s also give a round applause to Mr. and Mr. <Bride's Parents> for putting all this together.)

    If you're the Maid of Honor and you follow the Best Man start by having everyone give him a round of applause.

    2. Describe how you know the Groom (example: we met in high school playing football or I’m the Grooms little brother)

    3. Tell about the first time the Groom met the Bride, if you don’t know; talk about how the groom acts when he’s around her. If you don’t know that either, you’re probably at the wrong reception dude!

    4. Talk about the first time you met the Bride (or Groom). Focus on the little things you noticed about her. (example: she was very quiet at first or she looked scared when we started doing keg stands at Church)

    5. Love & Friendship. Speak from your heart about why the Groom & Bride are so important to you.

    6. The toast. Make sure you do this right. Slow down; allow the crowd time to grab their drink. Look the Groom and Bride in the eye when you give it.

    Notes for your napkin

    Quickly write this down on your napkin:

    1. Thank you/compliment

    2. History of your relationship to (groom or bride)

    3. History of their relationship

    4. Short funny & interesting stories (note: this is only a story you’ve told a thousand times, there cannot be any need for memorization)

    5. Reason why the couple is special to you.

    6. Toast


     

    Laugh Staff is built using stand-up comedians as writers and consultants. A wedding speech is the closest anyone will ever come to doing stand-up comedy, so it only makes sense to get help from professional comedians. Our comedians have worked for the likes of Howard Stern and SNL Weekend Update.

    View Our Speech Packages